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THE WORKS OF THE FLESH: ADULTERY

Galatians 5:19-21 “Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, ²⁰Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, ²¹Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.”

In this section we will start our in-depth exploration of the works of the flesh. It will be a series of sermons that will take some time to finish. Today we will cover only one: the first one: “adultery.”

It is a critical area that we need to be reminded of. It is an area that needs to be understood in detail.

The fact that it’s first in the list may have a special significance. Is it because it was then and it’s still today a very common problem? Is it because it has devastating consequences at the physical, social and national level? It seems reasonable to me.

Adultery is part of the Ten Commandments.

Thousands of years, ago, God thundered: “Thou Shalt not Commit adultery” (Ex. 20:14)

To God marriage is “holy” and the union between man and women is “sacred.” Adultery turns that which is holy into something unholy. That which is sacred into something profane.

God made another stern pronouncement about adultery in Leviticus 20:10:

"And the man that commits adultery with another man's wife, even he that commits adultery with his neighbor's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death."

In the New Testament, the message is the exact same:

Hebrews 13:4 “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”

Hebrews 13:4 Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.”

Thus Paul supports totally the Old Testament teaching: Marriage is holy and polluting it invites God’s wrath.

Scientific studies in the early nineties indicate that out in the world one out of three men and one out of four women have committed adultery.

Nathan Tabor, in the recent article, Adultery Is Killing the American Family, gives us some sobering facts:

“Adultery is one of the most terrible ‘facts of life’ in contemporary America. If you watch the daily soap operas on TV - many of which are just soft-core pornography - you might get the impression that there are more people cheating on their spouses than remaining faithful. And you might be right.

How many people have affairs? That's hard to say because not everybody will answer honestly. But sex therapist Peggy Vaughan, author of “The Monogamy Myth,” conservatively estimates that about 60 percent of married men and 40 percent of married women will have an affair at some time during their marriage.

Other relatively recent scientific studies tend to indicate that the numbers are one out of three for men and one out of four for women.

Nathan Tabor continues,

“Since these books were written more than a decade ago, and since more women are leaving the home and entering the workforce, the number of wives having affairs may also have reached the 60 percent range.

Why do husbands and wives cheat on their spouses?

Tabor adds,

Psychologists cite subjective issues like loss of love and feelings of alienation. Certainly the media pressure of our sex-saturated society is a significant influence. But a major factor is the easy availability of cheap and plentiful Internet pornography.

Statistics show that 25 percent of all Internet search engine requests are related to pornography. According to the National Coalition for the Protection of Children and Families, “approximately 40 million people in the United States are sexually involved with the Internet.”

Dr. Alvin Cooper and MSNBC.com conducted an online poll of 38,000 people, and 10 percent admitted that they were addicted to Internet pornography.

Some legal professionals estimate that as many as one-third of all divorces may have their roots in Internet porn or online affairs.

The pain and suffering caused by adultery is immense, especially for children. They are more likely never to marry, or to later divorce, if they had divorced or cheating parents. After a divorce, many children are unable to ever develop strong, trusting relationships.”

How are we doing in this regard? Are we clean?

What about mental adultery? Could it be that our mind is filled with mental adultery?

Matthew 5:27-28, "Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart."

Do we have lustful eyes? Do we lust after women or men on TV? On the Internet? Men should have neck pain because of frequent turning of the head in a sensual society.

Men are visually driven. That is one of the well established differences between men and women. Men are attracted by skin. The more skin is exhibited the more the male mind wants to look and lust. Some women are attracted visually as well, but overall women tend not to be attracted to skin as much as men.

Christian women need to be aware of this reality. Christian women should dress modestly and not contribute to this problem. That is why skirts should be as close to the knee as possible. Skirts that pull up when sitting will attract men’s eyes, and it can lead to lust in men.

Low-cut dresses are a problem. Very low back dresses are a problem as well, though not as much. Very tight skirts can be a problem as they tend to attract male attention. Very tight pants are a problem as well. The male mind tends to go beyond the pants and immediately visualizes what’s under the cloth, thus leading to lust.

In summer, shorts should not be very short. Very short shorts become “exceptionally” short when one bends down. And they should not be very tight either.

Christian women should strive to be conservative with their bathing suits, as should be men of course.

Shaunti Feldhahn, in her book, What I Didn't Know About Men, Informs us that “Men are visual.”

She then adds, “What that means in practice: Even happily married men struggle with being pulled toward live and recollected images of other women.”

Yes, men are visual. Christian men have to struggle with this tendency -- and struggle they must. God expects us to keep our eyes under control and to turn away as soon as we feel lustful feelings.

Christian men cannot blame women if they lust. They cannot say, it’s their fault because they dress seductively. We men must turn when that is needed; we must switch channel when that is required; we must leave the room if something is attracting is leading to lust.

Christian women are expected to help Christian men in this regard by making this problem next to inexistent in the church. Christian women should never be the subject of unwanted attention because of revealing too much of their bodies.

When it comes to fighting adultery, the best approach is to nip it in the bud. We must be well aware of traps brought to us by Satan.

Adultery doesn’t just happen. There are stages that precede it.

Before Adultery there is the meeting of someone. This leads to liking the someone, which leads to wanting to be around the someone, which leads to infatuation, and obsessive thinking about the person, which leads to secret meetings and finally the consummation and then guilt and then possible addiction to the adultery and then more guilt and then moving away from God and His people and then serous problems within the family, and then fracturing of marriages and then deep depression and finally spiritual death, unless repented of.

Women tend to be particularly susceptible to emotional attachments. In fact some carry on with emotional adultery, and never go into the actual adultery. Even so their heart is alienated from their husbands and thus they are mentally in a state of adultery, nonetheless.

It is important to be aware of the steps listed above and to put an end to them once recognized.

The major key is to ask God immediately for help to resist and be delivered from the temptation or Satan will pull us in, until resisting will be next to impossible.

Proverbs chapter 5 dedicates much space to warning us about the evils of adultery.

¹ My son, pay attention to my wisdom, listen well to my words of insight,

² that you may maintain discretion and your lips may preserve knowledge.

³ For the lips of an adulteress drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil;

⁴ but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword.

⁵ Her feet go down to death; her steps lead straight to the grave.

⁶ She gives no thought to the way of life; her paths are crooked, but she knows it not.

⁷Now then, my sons, listen to me; do not turn aside from what I say.

⁸ Keep to a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house,

⁹ lest you give your best strength to others and your years to one who is cruel,

¹⁰ lest strangers feast on your wealth and your toil enrich another man's house.

¹¹ At the end of your life you will groan, when your flesh and body are spent.

¹² You will say, How I hated discipline! How my heart spurned correction!

¹³ I would not obey my teachers or listen to my instructors.

¹⁴ I have come to the brink of utter ruin in the midst of the whole assembly.

¹⁵Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well.

¹⁶ Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares?

¹⁷ Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers.

²¹For a man's ways are in full view of the LORD, and he examines all his paths.

²² The evil deeds of a wicked man ensnare him; the cords of his sin hold him fast.

²³ He will die for lack of discipline, led astray by his own great folly.

Adultery is therefore to be evaded. The pulls toward adultery must be fought. The best way to fight adultery is to be proactive.

Here are some principles that may help:

1. We must accept that it can happen to each and every one of us. We must never think we’re immune. This would be begging for trouble.

1 Corinthians 10:12 Wherefore let him that thinks he stands take heed lest he fall

2. Know that Satan loves this device because he knows it works. It worked with David it can work with us, and it can happen when we least expect it.

Thus we can safely expect that Satan will most probably try it on us in real life or mentally.

3. Let’s not forget that a person who commits adultery doesn’t just betray a mate he/she betrays God as well. He/she doesn’t just abandon his relationship with his/her mate, he/she abandons his/her relationship with God.

4. Know for certain that adultery may be hidden from man but not from God and that God in time will make it come out in the open.

There are tons of examples where God made sure that the affair was found out in the most amazing of ways, even if it’s done with great care not to be found out.

5. Know that punishment will for certain follow and sometimes it’s quite “drastic.” There will be mental agony first in the form of guilt and then depression and anger and then whatever consequence God has in store if the Adultery takes place.

Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

6. Know that adultery, even if just mental and emotional, separates from God, and, thus, it takes away God’s protection and opens the doors to curses and attacks from Satan. Sin separates from God, it’s true, but it also links us to Satan. We move to his camp and we become his servants. And he will reward us, but with pain, anguish and disasters.

7. Know that if we are tolerant of the initial stages the rest will be hard to resist. Adultery starts in the mind. It starts with thoughts and emotions. Unless it’s caught at the early stage it will turn into an obsession and the action,

Matthew 15:19 “For out of the heart come forth evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual sins, thefts, false testimony, and blasphemies.”

2 Corinthians 10:5 "…and take every thought captive to obey Christ,"

8. There are things that contribute to lustful thoughts and finally adultery:

a. TV: Sexually explicit shows and movies. Soap operas. They intentionally use very attractive and seductive men and women to get watchers to become addicted.

b. The Internet: A great blessing and a great curse.

c. It would be insane to watch pornographic movies even with your mate. It will lead to lusting and fantasizing about the other person. It is poison.

9. Beware of work. Most affairs take place with people at work.

According to a study double the number of women who work at least part time have affairs than women who are housewives. Why? Meeting new people and having more opportunities. As the number of women who enters the work force increases so does the level of adultery.

One expert on the problem wrote that on the entrance to every work place there should be a sign: “Beware: This place can be harmful to your marriage.”

We Christian men and women must be fully aware of this and must always be on guard. If someone is getting too close, keep your distance. Make your values evident. Make your commitment evident. Keep your language clean and you will project a clean image.

If you have problems with a mate know that Satan will provide kind, understanding, loving men or women to trap you.

Spending time alone with fellow workers of the opposite sex is utter foolishness. It can and will lead to an emotional attachment and finally adultery and then disaster.

10. Pray every morning Christ’s prayer: Deliver us from evil or the Evil One. Why? Because Jesus knew that every day Satan would try to trap us. God is critical to protect us from falling into Satan’s traps

11. The greater the closeness to God the greater the ability to see danger as it approaches and the greater the strength to say “no” when the temptation comes to us.

At the beginning we read Christ’s words about the flesh being weak. Indeed it is. The flesh is weak and in Satan’s hands it is very weak.

Satan uses temptation to get us to commit adultery quite successfully and we must resist and fight and persist in the fight day in and day out.

Christ also gave us the secret to success and it’s also found in Matthew 26:41

"Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak."

Though the flesh is weak, God’s spirit, if abundant in us, is willing, that is, it is willing and able to do what is right. It is willing to say no when a man or woman comes our way as Satan’s instrument to get us to sin.

The problem therefore abounds. It is a serious problem with serious consequences. But the solutions abound as well and they are very simple: Prayer, study, and fasting.

By having an intimate relationship with God, we are daily energized to fight temptations and to win. God will provide us with unlimited energy to resist and finally Satan will flee from us, as the scriptures promise.

They are three barriers that Satan cannot penetrate. They are weapons that the flesh cannot win against.

In the future we will tackle another work of the flesh in depth. Until then, let’s reflect on the first one and let’s do what is our duty to do to win the battle against adultery.

THE NEXT WORK OF THE FLESH: FORNICATION